Up in the Clouds on my Way to Unknown Things

This title is literally how I’m feeling in this moment in life. For so long I have dealt with anxiety. Not day-to-day normal anxiety but paralyzing heavy anxiety. If that even makes any sense.


I cried the other day, tears of joy when I realized that I was “in the moment.” I used to sit in the bathtub with thoughts running through my mind, asking myself to be “in the moment” and I simply could NOT be. I hated it. I hated me. I blamed my genes, parents, and generations before me. Then one day I found mediation. I also found God.


Let me rephrase that, I heard God. No, he wasn’t speaking to me through mid air but through signs and people. He led me to where I am at this moment and because of it I am faithful. I am faithful to him and to this journey and path he has placed me on. If you’re reading this I hope you find some inspiration in what I’m saying. Whenever I have read anything like this before, I loved it; but I still could not figure out what people did to get there, to find their peace or happiness. My advice is to follow your heart. The real you is inside, behind the ego and the outside that runs the show. Follow YOU. He/she knows the way. They know what makes you happy and what always has. You will lead you back.


Whenever I get anxious or negative thoughts I shut them out right away. I don’t have space for that. I am learning to love myself entirely too much. Being brave can be one of the hardest things to do but it’s also the biggest payoff.


We are so much more than we think. Our minds are so much stronger than what we take them for. We can heal ourselves and it’s all up to us and our bodies. Take care of yourself and your body. LOVE yourself and your body and if that’s where you need to begin so be it.